You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was like an artic tracker. Walked ten paces from the tree, then 15 paces from the mailbox, dug down in the snow, and pulled up the case of beer he hid from his parents out there. It tasted like ice cold success.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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