thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Sorry about flashing you in front of your mom.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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