I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
What drink are we having for lunch?
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
Randomize
