So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
Someone shattered a urinal.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
