ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
Dude, did you really "knight me" and tell me I had permission to bang your sister last night?
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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