i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
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