you missed a midterm to shack? WOW. How desperate are you?
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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