My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
I have way too many pictures of poop on my phone
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
