I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Randomize
