so that wasnt chicken after all
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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