Texts From Last Night

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  (515): View more from Iowa

  Three words: puerto rican gang bang

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  (515): Three words: puerto rican gang bang http://tfl.nu/9vp5
  Replies (21) Good night (1159) Bad night (1062)
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  (321): View more from Florida Space Coast

  I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.

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  (321): I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment. http://tfl.nu/8o3c
  Replies (18) Good night (3271) Bad night (670)
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  (416): View more from Ontario

  Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.

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  (416): Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management. http://tfl.nu/afuw
  Replies (16) Good night (4796) Bad night (596)
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm

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  (248): I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm http://tfl.nu/t2ln
  Replies (105) Good night (9151) Bad night (1304)
• Favorite

  (904): View more from Florida

  youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb

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  (904): youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb http://tfl.nu/7q2n
  Replies (26) Good night (849) Bad night (5422)
• Favorite

  (352): View more from Florida

  Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.

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  (352): Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover. http://tfl.nu/82ke
  Replies (19) Good night (1587) Bad night (4799)
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  (830): View more from Texas

  we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient

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  (830): we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient http://tfl.nu/vzth
  Replies (12) Good night (1242) Bad night (3620)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?

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  (781): There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours? http://tfl.nu/3112
  Replies (2) Good night (3420) Bad night (712)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.

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  (407): All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck. http://tfl.nu/z2xd
  Replies (2) Good night (2203) Bad night (825)
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.

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  (785): Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer. http://tfl.nu/7lxv
  Replies (15) Good night (5812) Bad night (1251)
• Favorite

  (406): View more from Montana

  He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.

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  (406): He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana. http://tfl.nu/b27k
  Replies (9) Good night (3138) Bad night (903)
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  (318): View more from Louisiana

  would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?

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  (318): would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase? http://tfl.nu/h5qz
  Replies (6) Good night (1496) Bad night (1039)
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  (852): View more from

  I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..

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  (852): I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again.. http://tfl.nu/4a3e
  Replies (4) Good night (432) Bad night (1056)
• Favorite

  (425): View more from Washington

  I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.

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  (425): I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it. http://tfl.nu/bssm
  Replies (3) Good night (922) Bad night (325)
• Favorite

  (619): View more from California

  I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.

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  (619): I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good. http://tfl.nu/rh08
  Replies (2) Good night (641) Bad night (409)

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