Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Some guy on the train just glared at me. So I'm drinking tequilla out of a dixie cup. Go fuck yourself.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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