..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
all i remember is stealing his cheesepuffs and shaving my vagina in the hotel lobby
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I'm so hung over that I'm pretty sure I can feel the earth's rotations when I close my eyes.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
Randomize
