I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
Also, I want you to know, that not only am I apparently the expert on sexting. Our bishop is consulting me later. So my talents are varied.
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
Randomize
