They have a pepper shaker for pot.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
Randomize
