Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
This popcorn tastes like salt and regret. It reminds me of the first blowjob I ever gave.
You've ruined popcorn for me.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Cover your peen. We're going out.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
