We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
dinner is belligerent. she just poured the rest of the pitcher of margaritas into a take home box. people are staring.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
