dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
