first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Mom just posted ur drunk pix from Cancun in the newly made "My not-so-fantastic son" album. Thought you should know.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
When she introduced her friend to me I shook his hand and told him not to leave his ugly vest at my apartment in the morning. He took it off and bought me a shot.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
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