come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
