I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
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