As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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