I really like you and I'm tired of just hooking up. I want you be my boyfriend.
Uhh, I'm not breaking up with my girlfriend to be with you.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
Randomize