That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
So I called her out for all the gossip she does and she's like "you do the same, bitch"
So I was like "Im classy like the Countess, youre just a bitch like Kim."
Kudos on the Interstate Housewife metaphor.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize