Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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