You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm mumbling to people and trying not to accidentally shit my pants
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
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