I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I just got carded by a ten year old.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Randomize
