She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I was so drunk last night that I went into my 15 year old sisters room to have her peer edit the drunk texts I was sending to my ex.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize