it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
His dick was so small it sat perched on top of his balls like it was king of his scrotum.
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
