She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
When did angry sex become our thing?
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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