is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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