All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
How dare she call you insensitive. Should have told her about the time you let that girl in the wheelchair wearing the sombrero blow you.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
