Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
