I woke up this morning to the buzzer on my oven going off... I cooked fish sticks at 425 degrees for 5 hours last night. my house smells awesome
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
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