Sorry, I don't speak sober.
She transformed our coors light pitcher we stole from the bar into a fruit basket...
oh and if she happens to say anything about a cantalope and tissues... just go with it
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Note to self: Never spend $8 on a liter of rum again
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Randomize
