yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
