He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
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