Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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