I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Randomize
