By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
