Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
the jolly green giant just puched the pope. halloween is the best.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
In all fairness I did warn the guy I just spray tanned before we had sex so I hold no responsibility for the bronzer all over his sheets
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
the roommate is literally cooking green eggs n ham, and I'm too hungover to see straight. Dr Seuss nightmare.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize