I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
