You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
