I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I told my mom happy mother's day then rubbed my belly and said "Oh, and happy grandmother's day too..." She started sobbing. You were right, that wasn't the best way to tell her.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
he told me he was a chubby chaser.. then winked. i'm signing up for a gym pass as we speak
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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