we're blogging at a bar
How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Finals week game: One shot for every psychological trauma I've been through that I have to explain in detail. Man I hate my major sometimes.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Randomize