Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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