Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
We're exchanging pot brownie recipes in my substance abuse class. This is going to be an awesome 7 weeks.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Randomize
