I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
go do what you do best...puke behind churches
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
Randomize
