is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Considering who their parents are, maybe you should use vodka for the baptism.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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