I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Was almost hungover and got scared, skipped hungover, back to hammered. Fuck real life
I drank butter last night, who am I to judge?
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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