We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
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